I was in the bank yesterday closing out my account and the banker man asked me ' excited to go back home?'
I jumped up with a huge grin 'Oh Yea!'
He took this in. 'Was it really that bad here?'
I didn't mean it like that. It wasn't bad here, it just wasn't home.
I've made countless enemies on those red monster double decker's to last me a life time. It seemed I couldn't go anywhere without getting into it with a driver, old lady, crazy old man, gang of 12-year-olds and other foreigners like me but ones who don't speak English.
This last time I was trapped towards the front of the bus by the luggage holder - hanging on for dear life - as these drivers like to pretend they are on a race track- when a stop was up a head- This guy from somewhere like Russia maybe jumps up to get his huge bags - which were in front of me but to do that I had to let go of the pole and stand in the middle - left only to my own balance. I wasn't prepared to do this. Not until the bus had come to a complete stop.
But he didn't understand when I shouted in his face 'I have nothing to hold on too. Stop!"
as he lifted the bag and barreled me over anyway - his obnoxious ignorant grin in my face nodding his head yes.
I'm sure the look I gave him was universal, but still that stupid grin looking at me while maliciously knocking me down with his bag was more then I could handle. The driver would have waited for him to exit when the bus stopped but he didn't understand me as I yelled this to him. So I yelled some other things like 'fucking crazy bastards' and got off a stop early anyway. Just like that I was in a bad mood all day. Because of some arsehole who can't understand universal notions.
There I go again! And the anger is back.
So when a bank teller says 'Are you excited to go home?'
Of course I am because if you shout at a New Yorker at least they know to shout back - in whatever language they speak - they don't have creepy polite grins on their faces while they push you down. When you're angry - you show it. When you're happy - you show it. I just don't have a place in this polite society.
It's so repressed it makes me want to shout in everyone's faces - but I'll save it for home I guess. where they appreciate it more.
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